It was a small thing, but it was mine—a ceramic mug with a faded blue glaze and a tiny chip on the handle. I’d picked it up at a flea market years ago, and it quickly became my go-to for morning coffee. The size was perfect, the handle fit just right in my hand, and somehow coffee just tasted better in it.
So when I stopped by my friend Kate’s apartment one afternoon and saw her new roommate sipping from it, I froze.
The Recognition
At first, I thought it couldn’t be the same one. But when I saw the familiar chip on the handle and the small swirl in the glaze, I knew—this was my cup.
“Where did you get that mug?” I asked casually.
The roommate smiled. “Oh, Kate gave it to me. She said she didn’t need it anymore.”
The Confrontation
I turned to Kate. “That was mine. You took it from my place a few weeks ago, remember?”
Kate shrugged. “You weren’t using it. It was just sitting in your cabinet, and I thought you wouldn’t miss it. Plus, she needed mugs when she moved in.”
I couldn’t believe how casual she was about it. “It doesn’t matter if I wasn’t using it. It’s still mine.”
Why It Stung
It wasn’t about the monetary value—it was about the principle. That mug had sentimental meaning to me, and Kate knew it. I’d even told her the story of how I found it, and how it reminded me of lazy weekend mornings when life felt simple.
By giving it away, she didn’t just take an object—she dismissed the meaning it held for me.
The Awkwardness
The roommate looked uncomfortable, clearly realizing she’d been caught in the middle. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know it was yours,” she said.
I told her it wasn’t her fault, but I’d like it back. She handed it over without hesitation, while Kate just crossed her arms.
The Conversation Later
When we were alone, I told Kate, “You can’t just give away someone else’s things without asking. It’s disrespectful.”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s just a cup.”
“No,” I said firmly. “It’s my cup. And if you don’t respect small boundaries, how can I trust you with bigger ones?”
Moving Forward
I took the mug home, washed it thoroughly, and put it back in its rightful place. But my trust in Kate had taken a hit. I started keeping a closer eye on my belongings whenever she was around, which made our friendship feel strained.
Lessons Learned
Sometimes, the way someone treats your small possessions reveals how they might treat your bigger boundaries. If they can’t respect the little things, you can’t count on them to respect the important ones.
Final Thought
Value isn’t always about money—it’s about meaning. And when someone dismisses the significance something holds for you, they’re really dismissing you.
